you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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