covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
