So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
