If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Randomize
