office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
