so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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