omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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