so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
