The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
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Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
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And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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