look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize