Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
cat food counts as protein by the way
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS