you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
