Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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