im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize