so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Randomize
