just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
