so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize