i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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