Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Randomize
