Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
