i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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