I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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