I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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