So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
