yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
