So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
29 “I’m Getting Old” Moments
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
19 Worst Song Lyrics of All Time
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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