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• (925): View more from California

  So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (907): View more from Alaska

  You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you

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• (817): View more from Texas

  I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.

  (1-206): View more from Washington

  Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.

  (618): View more from Illinois

  Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.

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• 

  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (678): View more from Georgia

  Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!

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• (254): View more from Texas

  Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  you face planting the wall was epic

  (1-407): View more from Florida

  did you at least save my tooth

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