it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
You need Xanax blowdarts
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?