omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
