We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize
