im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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