If that was your dad, he is hot
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Randomize
