You kept calling me your small dog last night.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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