real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
