It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
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