Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
