i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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