I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
