But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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