You made me cry and you don't even care
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
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