don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Randomize
