My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Randomize
