Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
Randomize
