i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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