nut hugger
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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