Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
The adults are the big ones right?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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