There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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