My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize