How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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