ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
