I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
